Stepping down on Texas land is great (besides being back in the hot and humid) and seeing family and friends is great....
BUT - a huge part of me is still in Russia with all those sweet kids and all of our friends that have become so dear to us.
It is really hard to process all of these emotions... I feel myself tearing up at the drop of a hat these days... but this is always the progression of coming home...
I think the hardest part is knowing that I have so much, and these kids and grads have so little... don't get me wrong, God has definitely blessed me and I am SO thankful for it, but I KNOW that on many occasions I use those blessings in ways that benefit me - and not His kingdom. I guess coming home just reminds me of how selfish I am so much of the time...
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I need to re-evaluate a lot of things...
-how I spend my money
-how I spend my time
-the focus of my prayer life (me centered or others centered)
-how I view others (with my eyes or His)
-my future (my plan or His)
I challenge you to pray with me in these things... I think that God wants to do something huge - I can feel it... and He wants to use ALL of us.... maybe in different ways -- but I don't want to miss out on what He has in store
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